There is nothing more infuriatingly annoying to me than a southern accent. I don't care how much schooling you've gotten, you sound like a retard and I hate you for it. As soon as I hear someone spit out a "y'all" or an "I reckon," I want to claw off my ears and beat you in the throat with a cactus. It's a worse sound than fingernails down a blackboard, because when you vomit all over the english language with your speech impediment it's like the fingernails down a blackboard also has Down's Syndrome. Stop talking like that.I know what you're thinking. "But people can't help the way they talk! Everyone down there has that accent!" Wrong, ass-burglar. There are plenty of people down south that manage to be pretty well spoken in spite of their mentally-crippling hometowns. People who still speak like rednecks are either too stupid and lazy to figure out how to talk like a normal human being or too poor to pay for speech therapy.
Lots of guys think a southern accent makes a girl hot. Right. I never understood the whole "farmer's daughter" thing. Call me crazy, but I don't get turned on by a woman's voice when it sounds like she lives on a diet of moonshine, roadkill, and big brother sperm. The fact that she's probably dressed like a hillbilly doesn't help much either. I mean yeah, she'll probably fuck you, but at what price? You'll most likely get to bang her in a room that smells like crystal meth while her flipper children watch, her uncle video tapes it for later, and then you'll go home that night with a fresh case of hepatitis. And that's if you're lucky and the uncle stays behind the camera and out of the action. Save what's left of your dignity and rent yourself a whore for 5 dollars if you want to fuck something dirty and toothless.
I don't know how I got there from talking about a southern drawl, but there it is. Back on topic...
Yeah, I know that this accent isn't only the property of people from the south. You'll hear that accent all over the country. Mostly in rural areas and coming from the mouths of morons. So if you want to sound like an undereducated inbred chud baby, please, by all means, keep talking like you live in a trailer and have fun jerking off to NASCAR and Larry the Cable Guy, tard.
I hate your stupid fucking southern accent.
5 comments:
You sound like a typical Ed Hardy douche.
This is the stupidest load of shit I've read in a long time. I'm from a very southern state, pansexual with a very supportive town, and I'm marrying a farm owner. Insest doesn't just happen in one place, its everywhere. I've never met anyone around here that has EVER had sex with even a sixth cousin. Its very unheard of. Sterotypes are stupid and Ya'll sound like a snobs. Its not a grammar thing, its slang. Just like when someone says "Jerking off". Do some research on Larry The Cable Guy. He came from a very presidious, rich family. A family member of mine owns a very successful classy business, but he married a LAZY northern bitch and since then its not doing so good but, it well off to where even if it fails he and all of us are set for life .. That's all most northerners are, LAZY. Get a flat? Call a guy. And I hate nascar. I didn't grow up on a farm, but my fathers family bred horses. Southerners you see on TV that are "well spoken" are fake. They were make to lose the accent to relate better with others.
Be judgemental gets you no where.
I have a bachelors in mathmatical sciences, an associates in culinary and am now working on getting my masters in business and associates in photography. My rich family member is investing in my business idea and my fiance bought me property. So I'm on my way to owning my first photography business as soon as I get licensed and the building inspected.
Also, I was born in Missouri, and raised in ARKANSAS.
I am officially declaring shenanigans on that whole last paragraph. You might as well have called yourself a millionaire astronaut cowboy. If, in the event that you are actually telling the truth (you're not), it would be wise to hire a copywriter for all of your "business idea" correspondence and promotions because your writing style makes me cry harder than your sister did after she was finger-blasted by your "rich family member."
And you mean that dude Larry isn't really a cable guy? That it's all a made-up character? NOTHING MAKES SENSE ANYMORE!
Heather Nicole, "Bless your heart" means, "God bless you, because you need love". That's not lying. That's actually sweet. If used by a bitch though, it means "you sad pathetic being".
Anonymous 2. Southerners aren't obsessed with homosexuals. You can't group them as a whole, because they're all different. And "My Fair Lady" is one of my favorite movies. Her accent wasn't southern though.
TO THE POSTER:
All around the world there are accents. I don't really care much for the India accent, but I'm not going to call it vomit.
When you're brought up speaking a certain way, you can't just turn it off. Different southerners speak differently because they had different parents. I was raised by a Greek born Connecticut raised woman (imagine that accent) and a Texas born Missouri raised man. Just take a moment and imagine my accent. Like the second to last post, I also spent some time in Arkansas. I met some very nice people there. I myself like the Australian accent.
I'm a farmer daughter. I've never done any sort of drugs, not even alcohol or pot. I've also been told I have a strong accent, but I'm still understood by my friends in Massachusetts. There are many stupid, lazy people out there, but they aren't just in the South, they're everywhere. I went though speech therapy, to fix a speech impediment, which is what its for, not to take away someones accent.
I actually think the northern accent is quite annoying. Too much enunciation. My husband likes NASCAR, but he is a redneck. He loves a beer or two now and then, but what man doesn't? He came from a family much like mine, nice childhood, nice schooling, and does very well for himself, owning large shares in many companies like Charter, and Drury, while running his own tractor restoration/refurnishing business.
I was friends with a girl in my high school years that had a brother who made moonshine in a crock pot. That guy now runs a few car dealerships, and is a partner of one.
Cacti are more commonly found in South America, not so much in Southern North America.
I agree with most of the second to last comment, incest happens everywhere, it appears it happened to your parents also.
If you jerk of to NASCAR you might need to see someone, and in agreement to Anon2, I'm guessing you already do.
Man I a hate southern accents to the same degree. And I don't know where this hatred comes from. Maybe it a subconscious association to the good old southern inbred, uneducated, hick stereotype that exists. But I'm not certain of that.
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